Wisedocks

Donald Trump: The Shakespeare of Shenanigans

Donald Trump: The Shakespeare of Shenanigans

Donald Trump

Few figures in modern history have wielded words quite like Donald J. Trump. Whether he’s redefining basic facts, handing out self-congratulatory gold stars, or delivering lines that sound like they came from a parallel universe, Trump has proven himself to be the undisputed king of unintentional comedy.

The man speaks in superlatives—everything he does is the best, the biggest, the most tremendous. Even his fibs are record-breaking. If lying were an Olympic sport, Trump would have a gold-plated, very legal, very cool medal hanging around his neck. His relationship with the truth is about as stable as a casino built on quicksand, which, coincidentally, is how most of his business ventures ended up.

But credit where it’s due: Trump has gifted us some of the most head-scratching, laugh-out-loud quotes ever spoken. Who else could claim that "nobody respects women more than me" while simultaneously being sued for defamation by multiple women? Or confidently declare "I know words. I have the best words," while butchering the pronunciation of “anonymous” in a way that made English teachers across the country weep?

Of course, we can’t forget his incredible geographical knowledge, demonstrated when he assured a room full of people that "Belgium is a beautiful city." Or when he, the man who once thought injecting disinfectant might be worth a try, looked directly at the sun during an eclipse without sunglasses.

So, in honor of the man, the myth, the meme, I present to you a collection of the most Trumpian quotes ever uttered. Whether they make you laugh, cry, or just stare into the distance questioning reality, one thing’s for sure: there’s nobody else quite like him. And if you disagree? Well, many people are saying you're wrong.

Trump Quotes

"I have the best words."

 

"So please get your asses out tomorrow and vote.”

 

“Sometimes you have to toot your own horn because nobody else is going to do it.”

 

"The airplane was on a perfect and routine line of approach to the airport. The helicopter was going straight at the airplane for an extended period of time. It is a CLEAR NIGHT, the lights on the plane were blazing, why didn't the helicopter go up or down, or turn. Why didn't the control tower tell the helicopter what to do instead of asking if they saw the plane. This is a bad situation that looks like it should have been prevented. NOT GOOD!!!"

One week after gutting key aviation safety committee, fired heads of TSA and Coast Guard.

“And when you’re talking about an atmosphere, oceans are very small. And it blows over and it sails over.”

 

"If Hillary Clinton can't satisfy her husband what makes her think she can satisfy America?"

 

"Sorry losers and haters, but my IQ is one of the highest - and you all know it! Please don't feel so stupid or insecure, it's not your fault."

 

"I could stand in the middle of 5th Avenue and shoot somebody and I wouldn't lose voters."

 

“Why are we having all these people from shithole countries coming here?”

 

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