I Skipped Work Today

I Skipped Work Today
Published on: July 11th, 2023
Last updated: November 20th, 2024

My Body Hurts

The last few days of work have absolutely kicked my ass. Throwing 60-pound cases of oil and detergent for 11 hours straight will do that to you. It doesn’t help that we only get two 20-minute breaks during the entire shift. That’s it. No lunch. Just those two breaks.

When I tell my friends and family back home, they don’t believe me. The usual response is, "That's illegal; they can't do that." Well, they absolutely can, thanks to those wonderful "Right to Work" laws everyone was so eager to push through a few years ago.

Hell, in Arkansas, where I live, they’re pushing for laws that would allow children to get back into the workforce.

I half-joked with someone about opening a sweatshop for 12-year-olds, but then I remembered I’m not allowed around children. (Relax, I’m kidding.)

I Ain't Skeeered of Work

I'll admit, I’ve been working since I was 12. Spent summers picking watermelons and cantaloupes to buy school clothes. Did it make me a better person? Nah, I’m still an asshole. But I do think it instilled a strong work ethic, if that counts for anything. Honestly, though, who cares?

I’ve spent 30 years outperforming most of my coworkers. I could’ve easily moved up and been sitting behind a desk, but I just can’t stomach the thought of working in the same place for decades just to have an "easier" job.

I’ve quit more jobs than I can count just because I was offered a promotion. The idea of being stuck in any place too long sends chills down my spine. Manual labor sucks, but sitting behind a desk? That’s hell.

Back on Track

So anyway, I drove to work today and pulled into the parking lot. I usually like to get there 20 minutes early, sit in my car, and scroll through the news on my phone before heading in.

Today, though, I realized I had left my phone at home. I only live 5 minutes from work, so I figured, screw it, I’ll go grab it.

When I got home and stepped out of the car, the heat hit me like a brick. Suddenly, I really didn’t want to go back to that sweltering warehouse. But I went upstairs to grab my phone anyway—except it was nowhere to be found. I looked around for 10 minutes, convinced I must have dropped it at the convenience store earlier.

So I woke up my girlfriend and asked her to call my phone. Luckily, I found it tucked under the shorts I had changed out of before work. Yeah, I’m an idiot.

My girlfriend  asked, "Are you taking today off?" I was like, "No... I thought about it." But then the idea really took hold. So I called in.

Afterward, I asked her, "Now that I’ve called in, what do you want to do?" She just shrugged and said, "We could take a nap or lounge around the house," then promptly went back to bed.

So, I started tackling the miles-long bug list for the CMS instead.

Bike Ride

Creekside Park Bentonville Arkansas

 

Later, once the sun had almost set and the heat finally broke, I decided to go for a bike ride. I had downed a Monster energy drink a few hours earlier when I thought I was heading into work, so I still had a ton of energy. I tore through the neighborhood like a maniac.

Eventually, I got tired as I reached Creekside Park. It’s a new park with pickleball courts, a splash pad, a dog park, and Bentonville's first cricket pitch. As I rode past, I noticed a cricket match going on and decided to stop for a breather.

I can honestly say that was the longest I’ve ever watched cricket in my life. It actually looks pretty fun.

Cricket Pitch Creekside Park Bentonville Arkansas

 

After about 30 minutes, I headed home, but by then it was dark, and my bike doesn’t have a headlight. Dodging people heading home from the park and avoiding traffic was a chore, but I managed. I should probably fix that headlight issue soon. I’m a night owl, and these cool summer nights would be perfect for late rides.

I keep forgetting that I can actually go outside in the evenings here without getting eaten alive by mosquitos. Back home, you had to either be indoors by dusk or bathe yourself in three cans of bug spray and still deal with the buzzing.

Honestly, I haven’t seen a mosquito in two years, and it’s amazing after dealing with them for 40 years.

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